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We are at a yoga studio in Manhattan on a Tuesday evening, waiting for a Tantric speed dating session to begin.
Unlike that man, who manages to break the almost tangible tension in the air with those few words that ultimately lead to conversation, I remain silent. I make myself as small as Free websites for dating can, wedged between a pile of mats and a thick red velvet curtain that is inexplicably draped across the hallway as we wait to go in.
Make of that what you will. The majority of men look like they work in IT and have come from the office.
One woman in her 50s, perhaps free online anonymous dating sites most confident dating sites york the room, wears an best usa dating site combination of cycling shorts, a crushed velvet top, trainers and blue eyeshadow and she stands, wide-stanced, hands on hip, in the middle of the space, eyeing up her prey.
There are a lot of tops and websites with kitten heels and one women, who s us in when we arrive, datings a sweeping floor-length red dress with white polka dots. I also wear a dress which is floor-length, but only at the back. At the front its sits knee high, which turns out to be a mistake, as I have to try my tantric not to flash everyone during the many legs-crossed, on-the-floor exercises that come later.
It was Guy who had the idea to combine tantra with dating when he noticed a pattern in clients telling him they found it hard to meet people in New York. That is what Tantra is about and it forms the backbone of the philosophy around Tantric dating too.
I was 5. I might as well have walked in on my parents doing it. The men female bodybuilder dating site handed empty pouches, each with a on the front, which they too wear as jewellery for the evening.
As we move into the candlelit studio, we remove our shoes and are asked to stand in a traditional puja circle. With phones on silent and in bags, sex sites dating us of that electronic boise strip clubs we so often turn to in challenging social situations, we continue to bask a little longer in that awkward silence until Guy kickstarts the night. I count 36 of us. We start by doing a school-like energy experiment, led by Guy, before going around the room, introducing ourselves and saying what we want to get from the evening.
As does the late something man that she towers over next to her. My money is on them hooking up. Despite the palpable nerves in the room, everyone seems to give an honest and straight answer. All silliness — apart from the Strip clubs in texarkana Cat grin I wear to hide my awkwardness — is left at the door. Ladies form an inner circle facing the men on the outside.
Bringing love and awareness to the dating process
The exercises are no subscription free dating sites. Ladies first. But then I freeze. Am I meant to keep repeating the same thing over and over, or keep imagining up other lovely things to say about this complete unknown before me? The guy is kind and holds my hand — metaphorically speaking — through this confusing and new experience, and he laughs with me as I bumble my way through the task.
Another is a visualisation and share thing.
And so I find myself embracing a 7ft tall man who feels as resistant to this exercise as I do. To a song that seems to never want to end. With the next gentleman, I must now hug him and apologise on behalf of all 100 free chat dating sites sisters, which he feels sincerely grateful dating sites in england. Which I do.
It allows us to laugh at the awkwardness of it all and, perhaps, cunningly, let down our defensive walls, allowing people in and deepening the connection. Where I struggle to hold eye contact or stop grinning, they are very comfortable in themselves and with the language of the night and things we are asked to do.
In contrast to the women, each man I lock eyes with around the circle is like a dating free online site web ball of energy. Not sure whether to fight or flight. Trust me though, like sex, after the initial awkwardness of it, you start to ease into it and find your stride.
After roughly two and a half hours, we complete the rotation and my be remained firmly in my pouch.
Turned on: the tantra of online dating
Randomly, I bump into the something wants-a-lover women in Whole Foods a little gentlemans club vallejo usa. She asks me how I enjoyed the evening and I say I liked it, it felt good to try something new. But when I return the question she seems less impressed than I expected her to be.
For me, tonight was an opportunity to meet someone dating sites for women over 60 in an honest environment without the endless messaging, game-playing and faux confidence of first-date drinks.
It was a chance to be real and show our true selves, without judgement, in a room full of adults behaving like adults.
To be physically present, to try out real human connections. But I suspect some did. And, on another occasion, I might have ed them. Book your ticket to the next Tantric Speed Date here. Hannah Berry George is a Writer and Director. Find more from her lovely rental app hannahberrygeorge.
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